catching up once more

May 22, 2008

I keep going back and forth about how much I'm going to worry about Quin's developmental delays. Some days I really worry, did I do something? Or not do something? Should I get him tested for autism? Then I see him playing next to his brother, fighting and laughing with him. Stopping to sit down and look at a book. Giggle as I read to him. Give me a look after I think he's done with lunch that says "hey where's the rest?" Come from another room just to give my knees a hug. When I see these things I think oh he just has his own schedule on what he wants to learn The teacher from infants and toddlers, who started working with us, teaches a music class for children with developmental delays, including those with spectrum disorders. She invited us to join her last two classes for the spring. (there won't be any during the summer). We went to one yesterday. Quin really enjoyed it, let me help him do some of the motions for the songs. He seems to respond very well when there is music. So I have a feeling we'll be using that more to encourage communication skills.

She gave me a few things to work on last week during her home visit. One suggestion since he enjoys eating, was to take a picture of him in his highchair, laminate it. When it is meal time hand him the photo repeating several times "Quinton time to eat" Then take his hand and walk him to his highchair. It didn't take long before as soon as I hand him the photo and say "Quinton time to eat" he'd take the photo walk to his chair and set the picture on the tray then raise his arms to be lifted up. Mostly we were working on this as a way of getting him to respond to his name. We're also supposed to offer him choices, food, toys, what ever, getting him to participate and engage with others.

So all this is going on and we're trying to get the house in order for the weekend. Ken got the main part of the backsplash up. The area behind the microwave can wait. He also patched, primed and painted the walls in the front hall. Mother's day weekend he trimmed all the tree branches. Tomorrow he'll be powerwashing the outside of the house. I've been cleaning, vacuuming and trying to just generally purge stuff from the house. Heh I have a bag of baby clothes and books to send home with my mom this weekend. The clothes she'll give to my aunt, to give to my cousin for his baby boy. The books will go to the library she's a board member of.

Now I just have get together a bag of ripped torn clothes to go for fabric recycling. Our county has an place that accepts electronics and fabrics for recycling in addition to traditional recycling of thing like paper, yard waste, plastic, metal and glass. That's where all Alex's pants with torn out knees will go as soon as I can convince him to wear shorts. Heh I can't even convince him to wear short sleeved shirts yet. He will be the kid wearing socks with sandals this summer.

June 14,2008

Not too much going on here. We went cold turkey with Alex and potty training last weekend of May. Now this is the second time we've tried this. The first time was about a year ago and he would just pee where ever he stood, didn't matter if he was dressed or naked. He just couldn't be bothered to stop what ever he was doing to go potty even though I had him on a timer. It seems to be working this time. We started with every half hour the first week. I also told him if he wet his pants he'd get a new pair of underwear but not new pants/shorts. A second time he'd be stuck in his wet underwear. If he made it to the potty three times after that he could have dry clothes again. With in a couple days he was at least trying every time the timer went off. We stretched the time out and now we're at every hour/hour and a half and a couple times he's actually taken the initiative and gone on his own before the timer went off. Most mornings he's waking with a dry pull up but I'm not going to worry about night time yet. Next step is poop.

I think the reason it's working this time is because he's interested in certain activities like t-ball (next spring) and swimming lessons and I told him they don't let kids who can't use the potty do those things. I think that and the peer pressure at school and in playgroup are finally working in our favor. Al the kids in our play group are potty trained and have been for a year, half of them aren't even 4 yet. And several of the younger set 2-21/2 year olds are starting. He's a smart kid I think he's figuring out this isn't the way to still get babied.

I need to make an appointment for Quin with an opthamologist, just one more thing to eliminate in terms of reasons for the developmental delay. My mom had mentioned while she was visiting, that our family has a tendency to be farsighted. We have noticed that he has a bigger emotional reaction to stuff the farther away he is. Not sure it's a real big difference but it may be just enough that he isn't making the connection between words and objects.

Ken had an interesting conversation with his sister the other night. She'd recently been to a conference on learning styles (she's a trainer for Xerox). There are two main styles experimental and contextual (I think, have to talk to Ken to confirm) We all have both styles to one degre or another. It's just more apparent with people at either end. Basically we figured Alex tends to be a contextual learner. He just absorbs information, by seeing and hearing and practicing he makes connections between things very quickly. Tell him something once or twice and he knows it. Show him how something works like basic addition/subtraction and he understands and starts playing with it on his own.
Experimental learners don't always do well with tests and books, but once they find their niche they are the best at what they do because they know it backwards and forwards. It's starting to look like Quin is more of an experimental learner. He examines everything, picks it up and looks at is from all angles. When he first started playing with cars he'd see how they work by rolling them on the floor, then at waist level then at eye level then on something taller than him. After that he's try different surfaces, smooth, soft, bumpy. I'm starting to think this combined with the second child tendency to do things later because the older one does things for them is some of the reason for his delays.

He's still not really reacting to his own name but he is starting to bring me toys to look at. He's also starting to copy what Alex does as he plays. He wants to play next to Alex or watch him while he plays a lot mre now too. His new favorite song is Head, Shoulders, Knees, and Toes I have to help him with the motions but after I help him he grabs my hands and does the same motions.

Last night/today has not been a good day. I spend an hour with Quin because he had a tummy ache. I just rubbed his back and belly, he acted a couple times like he was going to throw up. I was even trying to encourage him, just so he wouldn't be in pain but he swallowed it right back down. Finally he burped a couple times and ten minuted later farted. After that he wanted to go back to bed. Then at 5 am Alex wakes up screaming at the top of his lungs that he needs to brush his teeth. Now we brushed his teeth before bed, he didn't want to do it himself so I did it for him (he goes back and forth between brushing his own teeth and having an adult help) I was so pissed but I got everyhting ready for him and let him brush his teeth on his own. Now because he was carrying on so loudly Quin woke again. Quin has a temper, takes a while to set it off but once he's lost it he gets a bit violent. I went in to settle him down and he was fine while I was there until he realized that I wasn't going to pick him up and take him downstairs, then he threw himself down kicking and screaming. I just walked out and closed the door. He screamed for another 5 minutes. I packed Alex back into his room and told him he couldn't get up and go downstairs until 7am.
Since summer started he's been getting up and quietly going downstairs to play and watch tv between 6-6:30. For the last year he had been getting up but playing quietly in his room until 7am then getting me up to go downstairs. Either way it is kind of nice because I don't have to actually get up when he gets up in the morning. So today I've had to cranky whiny children, I'm pretty cranky myself from interupted sleep, not a good combo. Hoping they both take long naps.

Mother's Day

This past week was no big deal until the end of the week. Wednesday we spent most of the day at Longwood Gardens. I had to leave by 2:00 because it’s an hour home and I had my yearly visit to the gyn at 4:30. Fun fun. The nurse who took my vitals was surprised I spent the day running around then came to the appointment. Then she thought about it a moment and said. “I guess this is kind of a vacation.” A bit. Next came the normal questions.

“Do you smoke ?”
“no”
“Do you drink ?”
“occasionally”
“Tonight ?”
“yes”

Everything looks normal, it was time for another pap smear, every three years now. It’s also time for another mammogram, o joy. Need to call for that appointment.

Thursday I got a fun e-mail. A producer from food network wanted to know if we wanted to have our cake shown on Ace of Cakes. Kind of left me a bit giddy. They wanted the backstory on the design.

The idea for the cake just started with monkey's and cameras. My husband is Chinese and 1968 was the year of the monkey. SO we're both monkeys, our oldest son was born in the year of the monkey as well. Until our younger son was born we were a house full of monkeys. My husband and I met through photography. He's a wedding photographer, I'm a pretty good amatuer especially with kids, my own plus their friends. Between us we've got more than 40 years experience with photography. My husband hobby jumps he's gotten back into trains because both our boys love them. He spent the winter building a HO scale track in our basement, so I threw in the idea of having him and the boys riding in an engine with me chasing them with a camera.


Friday Ken and I moved all the furniture out of the dining room, so we could get that mopped. Then I took the kids over to visit one of Alex’s best buddies. While we were out Ken put down a layer of linseed oil on the floor. Came home around 2:00 and put Quin down for a nap. Let Alex have a snack then he went down for one too. While they were both sleeping we moved all the furniture back slightly rearranged.

Saturday Ken had a wedding so I did laundry as my cold came on full fledged. Actually I felt it starting Friday night, the nodes on the right side of my neck were sore. I even went to bed early, that means I wasn’t feeling well. By this morning most of the scratchiness in my throat was gone but I’m completely congested. I didn’t really get a break from the kids. We got a break in the rain so Ken was out getting the yard ready. We really only have one more weekend to get everything in order before the party. No rest for the weary, especially since Quin decided he didn’t really want to take a nap. I barely got a shower in. I called into word, I’m hoping today was the worst of it and I can go in tomorrow.

Oh and my favorite new book, I saw this last week and have already gifted it to someone. If you have little boys it’s perfect. Little Boy It made me laugh as tears welled up in my eyes. It’s just as sweet in its own way as her other book SomeDay

End of April catch up

Not much going on here. Seems like Ken and I have hit the same "I don't want to do anything" rut. Don't want to work on the house, most especially the kitchen, don't want to do the usual hobbies, don't want to do anything that involves thought. Now I don't mind hanging around outside watching the kids play in this wonderful weather. But once they're in bed I'm kind of veging with real arcade games. Ken's been watching lots of You Tube.

I finally got my hair cut last Tuesday. I compromised, I really prefer my hair short, Ken likes it long. So I got a layered bob, cut right below my ears, stacked up in the back so it's off my neck. I hate hair stuck to my neck when it's warm, even if it's long enough to pull up because it's wavy/curly some always escapes. It looks cute when my hair decides to be curly and ok when it doesn't. Pretty much wash and wear which it the best thing for me. The less effort on my part the better.

Last Thursday we went up to Erie to visit my mom. Friday did a little shopping. Saturday my Aunt came in from Cleveland for a visit. Sunday I hung out with Sherri my friend from HS. Monday I drove back. Alex is the perfect age for trips like this. He gets so excited he was talking all week about going to visit his grandma. Quin on the other hand was a bear. But then all kids 1-2 1/2 years old suck at travel. It messes with their routine and they're in an unfamiliar bed. He didn't settle in until sunday and the next day we went home. Alex was the same way at that age so it's to be expected.

I got our Birthday bash invites in right before I left town. Finished sending those out today. I have a few extras if anyone wants one. I don't expect you to come to Baltimore, memorial day weekend, I'm sure most people have plans at this point but I'm happy to invite people. My Aunt Bonnie is all excited to come so she can see the Ace of Cakes cake we're getting. Duff made our wedding cake so I figured a cake for a combined 40th birthday was a big enough deal to get another one from Charm City Cakes.

Sunday was our 5th anniversary, guess this is a big year all around for the Eng household. We went to Tir Na Nog for dinner. We spotted it as we were going to PF Changs for my birthday dinner. Ken saw the big Guiness Draft sign in the window. He's all about Irish beers lately and most especially Guiness I'm wondering if he was Irish in a past life. I can't believe I am sometimes because I can't stand beer. No gifts this year because 5th anniversary is wood and we got all sorts of new wood in our new kitchen, that we both wanted.

Dinner was wonderful. Very tasty and protions were normal sized. Just enough room for us to share a piece of the Ginger and Guiness Spice Cake. That was so yummy. After we walked over to Cheesecake Factory and got a couple pieces to take home for later.

Monday was the boring usual. Tuesday after I dropped Alex off Quin and I went to the Family Center for his evaluation with Harford County's Infants and Toddlers. His skill sets are all over the place.
Cognitive 9mos
Communication 6-9mos
Social Emotional scattered to 12mos
Adaptive 12-15mos
Gross Motor 15mos
Fine Motor 9mos

So he's in need of intervention. The good news is that we've found this early and with a little work by the time he's three there shouldn't be any noticeable differences in his skill levels. I'm almost glad he'll miss the cut off for Kindergarten when it comes time. I think it'll be better for him to have the extra year. They want to start home visits with a special educ teacher. Work with him to get his play more varied, have him start imitating others, make consistant eye contact, so interest in a wider selection of toys, follow direction, and to play with toys in the manner they're meant to be used. Right now he plays with anything that rolls; cars, trains, balls but when he plays with other toys like markers he doesn't use them to write he rolls them around. He doesn't really stack things but he will put things in containers. Anyway I guess the key to him connecting words with actual objects is through imitation, so getting him to start doing that should help with his language skills.

We're lucky this is a free program through the school system. Our tax dollars at work.

Today was a trip to the Herr's snack factory in Nottingham PA. The kids (well the older ones) loved the tour. And once you have warm fresh potato chips, anything else isn't quite as tasty. I picked up a couple of bags of snacks for Ken. He was so hapy to see the jalapeno kettle chips, he opened them right up.

Tomorrow I get to call around and set up food for our birthday bash. We're looking at going with a place called Beefalo Bob's Ken is getting a bit nervous on the number of people it's looking like a solid 60 but possibly as many as 80. We should have better idea of numbers by next weekend.

That's about it for now.

Birthday week update

Tuesday was Quin’s 18 mos appointment. He’s doing well growth wise. 40th percentile for weight 55th for height, 90th for head size. The last of course means he’s gonna hit s growth spurt soon. Our pediatrician has started screening for autism at 18 months. I’ve read articles about starting treatment earlier being more successful. Well Quin failed the initial screening. Now this isn’t all bad, the doctor told me it was because of his delayed speech he failed. He has some pretty significant social skills. Basically they’re setting the net really wide because they’d rather over test and rule out kids who aren’t autistic than miss one who was. He did give me numbers for speech pathologists so I could set up a consult with one. He also gave me the info for the Kennedy Krieger Inst in case I felt I needed to have them look at him to be sure. I’m in the process right now to set up a consult with the speech pathologist they’re supposed to call me back to set up the final appointment today or tomorrow.

I was talking to my friend Jean yesterday and she said her pediatrician has started to do screening for autism as early as 6mos. They were asking her questions about Will at his last appointment. She thinks Quin probably had his one and only ear infection at a bad time. Not only was he learning to walk but it was a time when they pick up new words. Once he was able to balance himself all his concentration went into walking. That combined with the fact that he didn’t pop one tooth until 9 months old and has been getting a new one every couple weeks since then, most recently his second year molars, it probably made things hard on learning new words.

He’s got a big knot in the middle of his forehead. We spent Saturday up in Brooklyn. The only place to run around in front of my FIL’s brownstone is a concrete pad. The entire time we were there not one fall. We get home and I let him out to go play in the yard while we move all my IL’s stuff from the van to my BIL’s car. Suddenly we all hear a loud THUNK!!, followed by crying. He fell right on his face in our driveway.

Like I mentioned I received part of my birthday present Sunday on my birthday, the first season of Torchwood on DVD. I got the rest of it along with a Cold Stone cake on Tuesday. I guessed right. I have a new kitchenaid artisan mixer. I’m excited. You can buy all sorts of attachments for it. Yesterday was good and bad, I woke with a migraine. Even taking pain killers when I wake with one means, I can take the edge off but it won’t completely go away. Unlike the ones I get monthly due to hormones, which go away once I take something and lie down in the dark for a half hour.

We were supposed to go to Towson after Alex’s gymnastics class. Even though it was sunny the temps were in the 40s and it was really windy. It was not great weather for playing in the park, the original plan. Towson mall has a play area for preschoolers in the middle we were going to meet there then go to lunch at the Rainforest café. The thought of driving 25-30 minutes and all the noise once we got there, only to drive back was enough to make me queasy. So we didn’t go. I met Jean and her boys for lunch at the McD’s down the street, it has a play area. An hour of noise, I could handle. Then we came home and everyone took naps. By the time I got up an hour and a half later my migraine was a twinge.

Ken took me to PF Chang’s for dinner last night. It’s definatley a fusion of food styles not sure I’d call it American Chinese because there were a lot of South American/ Mexican flavors in the mix. I enjoyed it, not bad for a chain restaurant. We feel like boring old fogeys though because we were home by 9 PM. We thought about going to a movie but nothing appealed to us, and we’d have to wait almost an hour before the last shows started. With my head still aching a bit I knew I’d be out like a light if we sat in a theater.

In kitchen news we got our pulls and knobs in. Ken put some of the pulls on the drawers. They look really nice. The last of the trim goes up this weekend. SO all we have to do now is put in the order for the 2x6 burgundy tiles to use in the backsplash. So close to being done, not sure it’ll be ready by the party but we’ll try.

Burning Down the House

It’s been an interesting week. Last Saturday night Ken almost burned the house down. All just so he could move the switches for the family room over a foot, because of the wall extention. Granted when the electrician came Tuesday and got a look at everything he thinks whatever Ken did was just the last straw. He did say Ken’s work was good. The damage was done when he packed everything back into the box after he tested it the first time. A couple of wires must have touched when they weren’t supposed to. It caused the breaker to blow and the wire insulation to melt. So the breaker was replaced as well as the whole circuit rewired. The electrician was shaking his head the entire time mostly about the slipshod job the original builder did with the wiring. Stuff that definitely wouldn’t pass inspection now. He’s guessing back in ’86 the inspection checked a few things make sure they were done right then okayed the whole house. That was all compounded by the original owner who added a bunch of light fixtures to the house and did his own wiring. This guy did a lot of changes to the original floor plan of the house and he knew what he was doing structurally but electrically he didn’t. Ken now doesn’t feel safe in this house. And wants to go through and bring everything to code. This one little mistake cost us $2000, basically there went our tax refund.

Quin must be getting in his second year molars. The kid has been trying to stuff his entire hand into his mouth the past couple days. In other news I have an appointment with a hearing specialist for him. At almost 18 months he basically still only has two words. I know he has some hearing because he loves music and laughs at Alex when he’s goofing off, but he doesn’t react to his own name. I hope I’m wrong and he’s just a late starter. He’s my little cuddle bug. Comes up to me all the time to give and get hugs. If were sitting on the floor together he’ll lean against me. Alex on the other hand only wants hugs when he sees Quin getting them or when I drop him off an school and at bed time. And when I give him a kiss he turns his cheek towards me like “alright get this over with mom” Though he does ask for 5 kisses when I do this.

Alex lost all his trains and cars Friday. All day I had to referee between the two boys. Every time Quin was playing quietly Alex would horn in and take things away from him. And the constant. “mommmmeeeee Quinnnsss at the traaaaaiin table” was driving me nuts. The thing is he likes playing with Quin other times, loves to make him laugh. But when it comes to cars and trains, even the ones that are actually Quin’s he won’t share or he’ll take them from his brother. So in order to earn everything back he has to do some real work on sharing.

I mentioned I was competing in a creative team contest. The designers at DSP, every six months hold a competition for a team of eight to create pages using their products. Well this time around I made it as far as round three. It’s farther than I’ve gotten before. It would have been a nice birthday present, for myself, if I had made it. Ah well the competition was really tough, some amazing creativity out there. And yes it’s coming up, this time next week I’ll be 40. I’ll get to spend the day before on a day trip to Brooklyn. We’re going to pick up Ken’s parents and bring them back to MD. His brother will then take them back to VA. While we’re up there we’ll take part in the Hong San so we can introduce Quin to the ancestors.

Ken is taking me out to dinner the following Wednesday. Then I really have to get onto making the invitations for our combined birthday bash over Memorial day weekend. I would love to invite all my online friends. I might even send them out anyway, it would be great to have you here even if it’s only in spirit.

We just spent Saturday evening watching 300, twice. It reminded me all over again of my love of ancient Greece and Rome. As a kid I had a fascination with Greek and Roman mythology, this in turn an interest in the history itself, mostly the Hellenic period of the Odyssey and the Illiad. It even started my interest in Architecture. At U of MD I took a few classes on ancient architecture because of it. Actually I see all along my fictional interests have guided my non-fiction ones. When I was reading a lot of fantasy I learned a lot about medieval Europe, science fiction lead to actual science, and even now the romance novels I read are all in the Regency/Victorian era, so I’ve picked up a lot of info on the Napoleanic Wars. Not sure how much of this will be useful in the long run, anyway back to 300, which took place in Doric Greece. Later than my earlier interest. I think now if I was to be back in ancient Greece I’d like to be a Spartan woman from that time period. They had many more rights than most other women, including the right to own and inherit property. They were educated right along with the men, I guess with it being a military based society the women needed to run the farms and businesses when the men were off fighting.

I was talking to Ken the other night about how some people become better judges of character over time and how some don’t. He mentioned that his sister, who is ten years older, doesn’t have good judgement about people. She puts her trust in people who disappoint her again and again. Ken said his life got a whole lot better when his stopped listening to his family’s advice and went his own way. He said it still bothers him that they never give him credit for knowing anything. He can’t even shove it in their faces when he’s right because his brother always restates what he says and get the credit. Ahh, the trials of being the youngest.

This got me thinking about how I would have reacted to some of the people I work with if I had met them 15-20 years ago. There are a couple of guys in particular who are in their early mid-twenties. Both have graduated under grad, one is in grad school the other is kind of trying to figure things out. Travis, I met about a year ago when I came back from mat leave. When you first meet him he seems very serious but he has a very dry sense of humor. He teases me all the time, calling me a cool mom. He’s done this since he found out I was actually around for the tail end of the punk era. Travis is into classics; literature, poetry, music, even classic rock. I know if I had met him when I was younger the only time I would have talked to him was if we happened to have friends in common. He would have seemed too serious and even a bit snobbish to me then. Now we rib and joke and tease each other, and even talk a little literature. He really started teasing me after Ken wrecked my car and I had to drive the minivan full time. Heh, he comes to me when he has a head ache because moms have the good drugs.
His buddy Dave, I met this past holiday season when he was hired through Travis’s recommendation. He’s one of those good looking guys, who is really casual and doesn’t even know he’s good looking, and is just a little bit goofy and earnest. I know I would have had a super big crush on him when I was younger. I wouldn’t have done a thing about. I would have just hung out, thinking there was no way he’d go out with someone like me. I get Dave, I’ll talk to him about anything from graphic novels to philosophy. It’s fun to flirt a little but he’s at the searching stage. I remember that stage, seaching for what you want, who you are, what you believe in, your spirituality. Makes me realize how young he is to me. I guess as I get closer to my 40th birthday, I’m starting to really realize how lucky I am to have found where I need to be and who will travel that road with me.

Wednesday we had the granite installed. Ken was so happy that afternoon he was singing “you’re beautiful” to it, (the James Blunt song). It does look really good. And yes I have pictures. As of tonight we have a working gas stovetop. We were actually able to cook a full dinner tonight with out the help of a microwave. YAY!!!!! The plumber is suppose to be by tomorrow so the sink and dishwasher will be working and anything after that is cosmetic. I spent Quin’s naptime yesterday laying out the tiles patterns for our backsplash. I wanted to be able to figure out how many of each tile type we’d need and add 10% for errors. Then Ken and I started talking about pulls and knobs. I’ve found a set we like but I’m gonna check a bit more see if there is a better price out there. I do have to say that it’s a good thing our taste is very similar, there is usually not too much arguing over the little choices.

Updates

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pwlK3GC3lXs
Ken's video of our kitchen remodel to this point


2/21/08

I swear I think Quin has a crush on Dora. As soon as she appears on the screen he gets this huge smile on his face and stops what he's doing to go up to the TV. His ears have cleared up there is still a little fluid but our ped. feels the tiny bit remaining shouldn't interfere with hearing. He recommended that if Quin isn't saying a couple more words (in addition to the two he has) in the next couple weeks, we should set up an appointment with an audiologist and rule out a hearing problem. He does hear things but I notice they tend to be on the higher end of the scale, so it's possible he's missing sound on the lower end. Ken thinks it's just because he's pretty easy going and what makes him happy is pretty basic. Since we're meeting those needs without much effort from him, he doesn't feel the need to talk. 5-10 words at 18 months is considered normal so I'll give it a bit longer. It's so hard not to compare but I know Alex was unusual, he was babbling at 7 months and by a year speaking sort sentences. He talks a mile a minute now and his vocabulary amazes even me. I wonder where he gets some of the words he knows. Quin tends to be a much more physical child anyway and there are things he does better than Alex like catching and throwing a ball. (Alex still has trouble with that) I still can't help but worry a bit.

I hate cold bathrooms, so winter is the worst cold porcelin in the middle of the night is no fun. It finally dawned on me why my bathroom is so cold. It has an outside wall. I was gathering up clothes to put in a basket to take down to the basement and the ones closest to the wall were ice cold. Duh, I've been in this house three years and I just figured that out.

2/29/08

WooHOOO!!! We have a date for the granite to be installed. Next Wednesday, Ken has lined up the gas hook up to the stove top and the plumber for the sink. By the weekend we should have a working kitchen once more. That gives us three months to get things finished up, like the tile blacksplash and the cabinet trim. Just in time for our joint birthday party. That'll probably be the first time more of our family will see the new kitchen.

Ken almost gave me a heart attack today about the party. We we'r discussing what we need to bring to VA for his father's 80th birthday party tomorrow. Then he confirmed our party was over Memorial Day weekend. I said yes on Sunday. "I better check and make sure I didn't book that day. Oh wait all my spring weddings are Saturdays" I swear I would have smacked him if we had booked it. We picked the date before Christmas so we could get the word out to family, that way they'd be prepared for the invite. (My family mostly, I know my immediate family will come but some fo the extended family says they'll come then they back out whenever I try and host something. If they're gonna back out I want to know early on.)

I was talking with Alex's teacher Monday. She told me I could probably start working on simple addition and subtraction with Alex at home. His number recognition is the best in the class. He's also one of the youngest, I think there is only one kid younger than him, and a couple others that are a week or two older. She said none of the other kids are even close to ready. And the only time she can work with him is right after lunch when he waits for me to pick him up, and the other kids are settling down for naps. That's not a lot of time. Yay!! the John family math gene has bred true in at least one of my kids.

Happy Chinese New Year

Gong He Fat Choi

Welcome to the year of the Rat, or mouse if you prefer, either way it’s a rodent.

The year of the rat is auspicious for all new beginnings. It’s a time to turn over a new leaf and take a fresh look at the world. Spirits rise in the Rat years and market economies begin to show and upward turn. Discoveries and inventions are especially prevalent and, for all, opportunities abound.

Leadership sits well on the shoulders of those born in the year of the rat. For, just as this is the first sign of the twelve, so Rats like to be head of the game, at the forefront of the action and where they can give orders. Restless and inquisitive, these are busy people whose minds are constantly on the go. Above all they are clever and instinctively shrewd. As the Chinese say even in times of scarcity, Rats somehow always know where sacks of grain can be found. No wonder, then, that these remarkably resourceful creatures are the supreme opportunists and arch survivors of the Animal signs.

From east west astrology by Lori Reid

Not much going on, on the kitchen front, just minor things this past week. Ken set up the wiring for the oven and a couple extra outlets. They came and measured for the granite. We should be getting the replacement trim today so they can finish up the cabinets this weekend. Ken being the engineer that he is, has been particularly anal. The cabinets on the return are slightly off square, each one is an 1/8 inch off so overall it is ¼ inch off. He’s been trying to figure out how to fix it without taking everything apart. Mostly because the facing has been glued into place on the backside and the cabinets are screwed together in such a way that it’s really hard to get to a couple of them.

Thursday was Quin’s well baby appointment. I made it so we went right after I dropped Alex at school. I mentioned to the doctor that I was starting to get worried about Quin’s lack of vocabulary. He has three words at this point Mama, Aweh (Alex), and Dada. He gave me some numbers for hearing testing because he’s not really making animal sounds or pointing to body parts and such when I say the names either. When he checked his ears there was a lot of fluid. I got a script for some antibiotics, I guess it looked like they’d been like that a while. His first ear infection and I didn’t notice. I guess I figured his discomfort when lying down was from all the teeth he was cutting. They’ve been coming through one after the other the last two months. He has almost all of them now. The Doctor did say that they may not test Quin until 18 months because it’s a bit early to worry too much. It may also be that he had the fluid in his ears so long he wasn’t hearing anything correctly.

I spent Thursday evening and Friday doing last minute stuff for the book fair. Ken got home around 4pm, very jet lagged. He wasn’t very functional but he needed to stay up until at least 9:30 or he’d never get back in the right time zone. I had to wake him the next morning at 9:00 so I could go over to the store and make sure everything was set up. Came back home fed the kids lunch put Quin down for a nap and took Alex back over to the store so he could help me with story time. We picked Bear Snores On and Snowmen at Night to read. Ken came by after Quin woke up and got Alex and I went to work. Lucky me I ended up in receiving, actually it’s not a bad thing. I had a migraine so dealing with people would have been a trial. I’d taken enough painkillers at that point it was just a dull throb. At around 8:00 I was freed to help clean up the store which looked like a bomb had gone off. It was in a good cause and with the sales the book fair brought in the Goddard PTO will take home almost $600, especially since it wasn’t a lot of work on their part.
Sunday I wasn’t supposed to wake Ken until I was ready to leave for work but he got a bug up his butt about the oven cabinet and figured out it was made in such a way that we were supposed to cut it to fit our specific oven. So he worked on that until I went to work. My job Sunday was to take down January displays and put up February ones in the kids department.

Monday was back to routine, almost. Ken was home to meet the guy doing the granite template. I took Alex to school, came back played with Quin a bit, fed him put him down for a nap went and got Alex. The teacher said he’s doing really good with his numbers and he’s one of the youngest in the class. Of course part of his motivation was this week’s subject is trains and the game they had on the computer was Thomas. It is pretty amazing watching him lately, he spells out all the words he sees. I see the understanding between letters and sounds and written words starting to click. I worked again Monday night and Tuesday was back and forth to the dentist day for cleanings. Silly me back in August, when Quin wasn’t really mobile, I figured I’d split up my cleaning from Alex’s. Take Quin with me in the morning have a friend watch him in the afternoon when I took Alex after school. That won’t happen again next cleanings are back to back. But my friend Jean was really great about watching Quin for both appointments. She said she’s just returning the favor of me taking her oldest to gymnastics class the last few weeks because she’s had to take the baby to weight checks at the doctor’s office. He wasn’t gaining enough weight and it was becoming a failure to thrive situation. He’s doing much better now on the right formula and gaining about a pound a week.

Yesterday was gymnastics class and playgroup lunch at Chuck E Cheese. I don’t mind these as much anymore most because my kids collapse in exhaustion when we get home at 1:30-2:00. Last night was the PTO meeting. My son isn’t even in elementary school and I’m going to PTO meetings, weird. Not sure how long this will last but I’m doing a self portrait a day challenge this month. I’ve kept up so far. I know I couldn’t do a whole year. I’ve been trying to do just a photo a day challenge for a year and a half now, and the days I miss add up to about a week a month. I’ll upload what I have so far and try and post them.

I love my children I really do but when I don't get that two hour break from them during the day you get one cranky, irritable woman by 4:30-5:00pm. Alex is the one who really gets to me with the constant chatter, singing and questions, he's only ever quiet when he's sleeping and even that is questionable. Today being his birthday, (we had a party for hi Wednesday with his playgroup friends) I took him to cold stone creamery for his free birthday ice cream. Quin silly child that he is promptly fell asleep in the car. We did make one other stop at Hallmark, because I needed birthday cards to go with the present I'm mailing my step-dad for his 70th birthday next week. Quin slept through the stop at the card store and the trip over to cold stone, he woke as I put him back into the stroller a second time. So he might have slept 30 min max, usually he takes a two hour nap and I thought we'd left early enough that we'd get home and I could just put him to bed. But I think the little stinker was up at 6am like Alex was today.

We enjoyed our ice cream, I shared mine with Quin. Alex ate half of his and we took the rest home for later. We got hme and I figured I'd let them burn off a bit of their sugar high. An hour and a half later I took Quin up hoping for another hour of sleep from him. I told Alex he didn't have to go up and take a nap (mistake, big mistake) but he did have to lay down on the couch and rest. Now usually if I lay down on the couch with him he'll fall asleep. Not today, kept up the questions and chatter and after an hour I gave up and let him go play. I could hear Quin on the monitor the first half hour we tried this, then silence but that was short lived, so he came back down too. Needless to say I had them both in bed by 7pm, took a shower to de-stress and watched Night at the Museum. At a little before 10 I hear Quin fussing, then quiet, then full out crying, then quiet, when he didn't get quiet again the third time I brought him down. He was acting like his throat bothered him a bit gave him a little juice flavored water and set him in Alex's vibrating rocker.

Ken's gonna love this, Quin was completely fascinated by Throwdown with Bobby Flay. Let him chill for a half hour and took him back up. I have a whole week of this my only breaks from Alex being when he's in school and the night I work. I can do this.

Speaking of school Ken and I had a chat a couple weeks ago about school once the boys got older. Elementary school doesn't worry us. The school they'll go to is one of the better ones in the county. It's once they get to middle school I worry a bit especially if the "Every Kid Left Behind Program" is still in effect. I'm sorry but I feel that in certain subjects kids need to be grouped depending on ability. It's not so bad here in HS because they offer AP classes, I just feel like middle school will be the lost years. Alex is a bright kid and loves to learn I don't want him to loose that. He's and Aural learner. He hears something he picks it up pretty quick. I just worry he'll get bored in class and start acting up, clowning around, get in trouble if he's not challenged. Quin I worry about in a different way because I can see even now he has very hands on learning style. He has to sit there and hold things, manipulate them, alot like his dad. He's not going to test well, unless he works really hard. I'm a visual learner to some extent, some subjects I can read and understand others I have to sit there and play, write, draw it out. I know I have a visual memory not photographic really but if I physically put something somewhere I know where it is even if it gets buried. This was a big help when I was front list manager at the Union Station store. If I set up a table display or put things in overstock, you only had to ask me and I'd point right where it was.Back to what I was actually talking about before that tangent. Worried about school. We talked and if it's only the two boys, meaning I don't get pregant by spring, we're going to consider sending the boys to private school starting 6th grade, if we can find something that isn't too religious. I doubt that's very feasible in this area. If we have a third there is no way we can swing private school for three kids. That's actually where we left it to revisit later. I'm almost hoping Alex's artistic ability gets stronger then he'd be able to apply to Maryland Inst of Art as a high school student, easier to get in than if you wait until college.

Well almost all the cabinets are in place. Only one last one needs to be fixed in place and that's just waiting until the spackle on the wall extention dries. They come on the 4th to do the template for the granite. Could have done it this week but Ken felt it would be better to wait until he was back from Korea.it'll be another 2 weeks after that before it's installed. Gives Ken time to do the wiring for the oven. That and they should be able to get the molding up on the cabinets by then as well. If of course it actually gets here this week. It was supposed to be in before all the install started.

You can see the wall extention better from the family room.

As of today this is what the kitchen looks like.

Monster post to catch up on everything

01/07/08

So Friday night was just the beginning. Soon after I posted Ken got home with Alex. He curled up on the couch which isn't unusual after he's had an active morning. Then he complained about his tummy hurting. I thought nothing of it because I figured he was hungry, since he hadn't really eaten anything since breakfast. Fast forward and hour later and he's puking all over the couch and his favorite blanket and stuffed animals. Load of laundry parts two and three. Then Ken got the idea to run out to the store and get a bottle of lysol hoping to control the germ spreadage. I think it was too late at that point. Alex threw up a couple more times before we convinced him to go upstairs to bed. Then the diarrhea started, popped him in the tub hosed him down. Got him into bed, told him to take a couple sips of water. He woke a couple hours later and gulped down what was in his cup then threw it back up ten minutes later. Load of laundry number 4. Quin through all this is trying to get us to walk with him, though he did pull himself to standing without using furniture. Ken got that on tape.Once the kids were in bed I made the mistake of eating dinner. Soon after my lower intestines liquified. At about ten pm dinner came back up. I curled up on the couch with my heating pad (for my back) and our big fluffy blanket now clean again, and watched Oceans Eleven. Crawled up to bed around 1am. Ken got up with Quin and fed him around 8am. Alex was up soon after so I went down to help. At 9:30 I was getting hot and cold flashes and everything hurt so I popped three ibuprofin and went back to bed. Woke around 1:30 took a hot hot shower and felt almost human except for the achiness and fatigue. Heard Quin in his room waking from his nap, changed him and brought him downstairs. Ken was crashed out on the couch in the front room and Alex on the one in the Family room. Dinner that night was two pieces of wheat toast. Ken was smart and didn't eat dinner so when it him a couple hours later all he was throwing up was toast and water. Why he even bothered trying to go to work this morning I don't know. So that was my fun weekend. I'm letting Alex recover one more day before sending him back to school. Hopefully routine will be restored.

01/08/08

Preschoolers are strange and wonderful creatures, Charming and whimsical one minute frustratingly stubborn the next. Shortly after he turned three Alex insisted we leave the light on for him to sleep. Now he already had a night light in his room but he was insisting on the overhead light. I KOed that and brought in a small table lamp. Well for the last month he's been sleeping with his covers over his head. Now I asked him if I should just turn the lamp off. "NO!NO!NO!" He just wants me to tuck him in with his covers over his head. The Whys have started in full force. A typical conversation goes like this:Mommy Why Gordon break Trevor cart?Because he couldn't stop in timeWhy could he not stop?Because he didn't see the crossing gate was closedWhy he not see the crossing gate?Because the Banner was covering his eyesWhy the banner on his eyes?The wind blew it thereWhy the wind blow it there?I don't know (teeth clenched in frustration)now this wouldn't be so bad if I hadn't read this story to him dozens of time and if he hadn't seen the video version of it just as many. Multiply this by thirty and you have a typical day for me when we're both home. Good thing he has school three days a week and I work two evenings, or I might be crazier than I already am. I don't know is the only way to actually stop the questions because if I say something like that's how the story goes or that's nature he'll ask why again.It reminds me of some of the lyrics in Chris Isaac's song PleaseWhat's the problem?What's the question?What's the answer?Where's this heading?You keep talking.Where's it going?If there's an answer I don't know it...PleaseYou're killing me.PleaseYou're killing me with all these questions.

1/12/08

So Monday was a recovery day, Tuesday Alex went back to school, which is just what my nerves needed. I went to a PTO meeting for his school that evening. I'm now organizing a book fair. Not that it's really much work I have connections, since I actually work for B&N. I attempted to take down Christmas decorations. We got the tree down but all the extras are still hanging out mostly because the bin I need to put things back in is down stairs and even half empty it's heavy and I need Ken's help to bring it up. I keep forgetting. I really need to take care of it this coming week. We need all the space in the dining room so we can unload our cabinets. Kitchen remodel begins Friday. Well it kind of begins Thursday. The plumber is coming in to install the pipes for the gas line. Once we have that in we contact BGE and they put in the connection to the main line in the street. Wednesday as you can tell from my post a couple days ago, was a hair puller for me. I'm so looking forward to gymnastics starting up again. Wednesday aren't as bad for me once we start having a regular activity to do. Thursday was another school day and Friday I made a playdate for Alex with his best buddy. Jean, his mom and I spent the afternoon chatting between refereeing. Saturday we went out to VA to take Ken's parents out for Dim Sum. Originally my BIL planned this but they changed their minds because next weekend Ken's niece is bringing her baby to see his great grandparents. We can't go next weekend because we have to be here for the kitchen destruction/construction. Su was actually happy we came and took the parents off her hands for the day, mostly because next week she'll have to play host with everyone there.Big news Ken interviewed for his GS 13. He's pretty sure he's got one of the two available slots. The first two people took an hour in the interviews and the one guy came out shaking his head saying he really screwed up. Ken thought he was in trouble going in but he was out of there in a 1/2 hour. Usually you'd expect shorter to be bad but the interview is a lot of technical questions about how projects are handled. Ken said as he answered questions the information he included answered several of the follow up questions. So he's feeling pretty good but he doesn't want to get his hopes up too high.So the travel starts once more. Looks like this year there will be 8 trips to Korea. Ken is figuring he'll be on at least half of them, starting with the one at the end of the month. Not quite as much travel, but the time he's gone will be a full week to 10 days. So I have to hope work can be flexible for me those weeks. I can get a sitter for Wednesday and Saturdays, I normally work either Friday and Sunday or Sunday and Monday.
01/15/08
This Wednesday was a bit busy. Gymnastics started again for Alex, I think we have a birthday party following that for one of the playgroup kids. Then that evening Ken’s work group is celebrating a good year by going to dinner at Fogo de chao. Our sitter got here at 4:30 dinner is at 6:30 we were gonna make a brief stop in White Marsh to look at granite for our counter tops and get a quote, but I found out they close at 4:30 so no point.Oh man I just realized Ken is going to be out of town for Alex's birthday. Ahh well Alex won't really know since we're having his party 4 days earlier.

okay I just want gravity to lay off me for a while. I slipped and fell twice today. First time I was in th parking lot outside Target. Just pulled Quin out of the cart and was heading for the sliding door to put him in his car seat. Slipped on some black ice. Pulled a muscle in my left thigh and am pretty sure my butt is bruised I have a big bruise coming through just under my right knee as well. It was pure luck I didn't re-injure my right knee. It's also lucky Quin wasn't hurt. He didn't roll out of my arms until I was already on the ground. It's also good that kids winter wear is so puffy. As soon as I got him buckled into his car seat he stopped crying, really he was just scared.We went home hung out a bit then at 11 I decided I needed a shower, it wasn't quite Quin's nap time but I figured the safest place for him was his crib if he fell asleep good if not I'd get him once I was dressed. Fall number two was in the shower. Foot slipped and I basically sat down on the edge of the tub tearing the shower liner. 01/19/08

I don’t know why I thought yesterday was going to be the start of our renovation. I guess because the plumber was in Thursday to rough in the pipes for the gas line. Anyway we spent Friday faxing around our floor plan to get quotes on granite for the counter tops. Then we cleared out the rest of the stuff in our cabinets.

The guys got here bright and early this morning. We hit a few snags two minor, one kind of major. The first was the tile backsplash was adhered to the wall so well they had to cut it out and replace the plasterboard. Then once they removed the cabinets the found out the wood floor was put in around them. So there is wood where ever the appliances were but under the cabinets there is none. The guys are gonna put in some particle board to even out the floor, because we’ve extended them out to get a return and enclose the space a bit. Those cabinets will be on the wood floor so to get everything even we have to fill in the holes. The final one is a big pain. We were not expecting pipes in the one soffet. Yes it does share a wall with the half bath but the two upstairs bathrooms share the wall on the other side of the half bath, the one that has the toilet and sink on it. So you would think all the pipes are in that wall right ??. If we can get the pipes raised two inches there will be no problem because the build up of the cabinet molding will cover it and we can get the cabinets in where they’re supposed to be. I think a plumber is coming by to look at it Monday.

Alex had a grand time watching everything going on. We have a window between the family room and the kitchen, he climbed onto his train table and had a perfect view. He was of course asking questions every five minutes. “What’s the man doing? Why he do that? What that noise?” He also spent some time ringing the chime we have in that window, well that and hammering the sill with his plastic hammer.

Quin was the real surprise today. He didn’t wake up until 9:30. Even when he sleeps late it’s not much past 8:00 especially with him in bed by 7pm and one two hour nap. Usually he’s up as soon as Alex is noisy which is 7am.

I’ll probably post this in the preschooler forum to see if anyone has suggestions. Alex is really getting annoying with his delay tactics. The bedtime ones I can handle. He knows I’ll read him two books so if he putzes around too much he loses a story. If he really takes too much time he loses both. He’s only lost both stories once, but usually once a month he loses one. He doesn’t like losing a story so just the warning “Finish up in Five minutes or you lose a story” gets him moving. What is frustrating me are the delays when we’re trying to go somewhere, even if it’s someplace he wants to go like gymnastic class or a friend’s house. Soon after becoming a mom I learned to build in a half hour 40 minutes to my out the door time. And many times I’ll load things into the car ahead of time like when the boys are eating breakfast. That means all we need to do is use the potty and get shoes and coats on. He knows how to use the potty by himself, I get him into the bathroom and then I go get Quin ready expecting him to be finished , when I get back five minutes later. No, he’s still standing there singing the same song, or spinning the toilet paper roll. Even if I stay in the bathroom and continuously repeat pull your pants down and use the potty, he’ll just want to play. Shoes and coats are slightly better. He’ll happily run to the front hall and get them, but then he’ll sit on his feet so I can’t get his shoes on him. Or he’ll stand there crying because his mittens fell out of his hat to the floor under the bench in the front hall. He’s smaller than I am and closer to the ground to boot, so I tell him to bend down and get his gloves, they’re right there. Even getting him into the car and buckled in is a chore. By the time this is all over we’re leaving 5-10 minutes later than I wanted too. I have the feeling that no matter how much time I get things going before hand it’s till going to happen. Now I know some of this is my issue. If I’m on time, I’m late, because on time to me is ten minutes early. I let this go when we don’t have a specific time to be anywhere and to be honest I was way worse when I was single because I was always 15-20 minutes early for stuff. If we’re going somewhere I don’t want to go I will time things so we’re 5-10 minutes late. Like I said I’ve gotten better, mostly because Ken’s family can’t agree on a plan or time for anything so we’ll only get a general range for when something will happen. I guess that’s where he gets it from.

my 1980's kitchen

My diningroom filled with stuff


my kitchen this morning


my kitchen tonight, not much cooking going on it huh

ugh

Well last night was not a good one. Actually it was until about 1:30 in the morning. I had heard Quin fussing off and on since about 10pm. This time it was a full out cry. So I checked on him. The first thing that hit me as I walked in the room was the smell. Yes he had thrown up in his crib then rolled through it so he was covered in little bits of regurgitated lasagne. I can handle baby spit up but once it gets to real food puke, I start gagging myself. I managed to get him sitting up so at least he wasn't laying in it anymore. Then removed the stuff that was clean and finally the stuff that was covered until all that was left was the sheet and Quin. I needed Ken to help at that point. I just couldn't get close to Quin with out almost being sick myself. Ken got him into the bath and rinced him down then soaped him up. Meanwhile I changed the sheet and gathered all the puke covered stuff into the hamper, I figured I'd deal with that mess in the morning. Then I took over and washed Quin's hair got him dried and redressed. He was happy as I put him back in bed. Not a half hour later I hear him again, though he wasn't crying this time. He spit up once more, though this looked mucusy, and didn't smell nearly as much so I cleaned it and him up on my own this time. It's amazing how one little person can create a whole load of laundry by himself in such a short time.

That wasn't the end of it. This morning after breakfast Ken went to change him and he had a major blow out, I mean up to his shoulders in poop. Guess who hit the bath again. I think he's got a stomach bug. No fever and he seems fine otherwise but his poop is still really loose and he doesn't have much appetite. In the course of all this I pulled a muscle in my lower back. This means a trip to the Chriopractior in the near future. I've been walking around like I'm 90 all day.

In other news one of my pages was picked to be Memory Makers featured idea for their online gallery on Jan 8th. I'll leave the link but it won't be active until the 8th. So check it then if you like I'm posting it below as well. http://www.memorymakersmagazine.com/page_ideas.aspx

Swish Kit-Tina Chambers

Super star Template-Rene Bross

Felt Pink Scallop Stitch Alpha-Melany Violette

I have a relatively Quiet house for the moment. Alex asked to go to the train museum but Ken said it would have to wait until tomorrow. But they could go to the train store. So they're in Baltimore looking at trains. I'll see them again about dinner time. Until then it's me and my cuddle bug.

mute buttons and cracked heads

Why don't preschoolers come with a mute button? That way they can babble and scream and chatter all they want and I don't have to hear it. Alex is getting on my last nerve today. Not really sure why, maybe because I'm tired I have a head cold and a sinus headache that comes and goes. Being asked the same thing 5 times even if I answered the first time it driving me nuts. Most days I can ignore it but today it's just pushing buttons.I sent both boys up for naps early. We're going to Longwood gardens for dinner as well as to see the Christmas displays. We're going with some of the playgroup families. But I invited my Aunt along. So she and her family are joining us as well. I think they decided to do it because it's on the way to Chambersberg where my uncle's family is and they spend Christmas with them ever year. Last year we went to Longwood but during the day so we didn't get to see everything lit up. I'm looking forward to it.

I've decided I'm not going to be surprised if I end up taking one of the boys to the emergency room one day for a cracked head. Within an hour of each other last weekend they both landed on their heads. Quin was first. We keep the door to the basement closed now because he can scoot across the floor pretty fast. Well I went to use the bathroom glanced at the door it looked closed. Ken was in the front room. I guess the door wasn't latched and the cat had been downstairs. He pushed the door open. Quin likes to walk up the stairs now he does this with the help of an adult because he still can't walk by himself. I guess he decided he was going to go downstairs and try it himself. I hear "mommy look what Quinton's doing" which is a familiar refrain in this house and usually means he's into Alex's toys. Then I hear a loud cry. Ken got there first. Luckily he must have rolled down and the stairs are carpeted. He only had a slight knot on the back of his head.Like I said not an hour later Alex took a header of the back of the couch. He was jumping on it and launched himself over the back. Thank god he's been in gymnastics class the entire fall, he knew how to curl himself up as he landed. He actually only hurt his foot when it hit the train table on the way down. I just know now that an emergency room visit is in our future.

I'm amazed both kids are leaving the tree alone, well mostly, sometimes Alex likes to rearrange the ornaments. The only thing he insists on is that I light it when we come down in the morning.

Randomness

Just stuff that has occured to me lately.

Like the other day Ken was driving us all somewhere and this car cut us off and this little voice pipes up from the back "People just donno how to drive." I guess I say that alot in the car. I suppose it could be worse, at least he's not repeating any swear words.

I really really really wish Quin would just learn to walk on his own. This walking around holding onto adult fingers kills the back. That being said his new nickname is Mr. Scoochbutt. He gets around pretty darn fast, just scooching along on his butt. Always send Alex into a panic when he gets close to the train table. (even if he's ten feet way)

How is it that my 14 month old eats twice as much as my almost 4 year old. Actually we've noticed our boys do a lot of things opposite. Alex was babbling away at 10 months and has never stopped he actually had a good sized vocabulary by 18 months. He was crawling and cruising at 7-8 months and walking without help by his first birthday. He's been go go go always. Quin has just now really started babbling he refuses to even try crawling and as you've seen above he'd rather walk with the help of mom or dad. But then he eats really well, will try any food as long as it's from mommy's plate, he's a better sleeper in that he doesn't wake alot at night. Unless of course it's a night Ken and I would like some private time. How he knows, I'll never know because we never actually say anything. But on those nights he wakes up several times in the evening. Talk about mood killer, good thing we have a pretty good sense of humor.

The one that usually doesn't let me get a full night is Alex at least once a week he's up 3-4am for whatever reason, (stuffy nose, bloody nose, coughing, wet his bed, lost his blanket) and then he's up for the day between 6 and 7. Luckily after a trip to the potty he'll play "quietly" until his clock says 7:00. Of course the fact that he boys do things oposite gives me hope that I can start potty training Quin at 18 months and have him fully trained sometime after he's two. Alex refuses to get it. We've tried just about everything and it's just not happening.

We've been trying for a third child since July. Now I do want a third because I think then our family will be complete. That being said everytime my period shows up a little cheer goes up in my head. So even though I want another I guess I'm not quiet ready yet. We'll just wait and see what happens.

I've set it up we're going to have a cake done by Charm City cakes for our joint 40th birthday celebration in May. We picked may because at this point if I do get pregnant I'll be due in late summer/ early fall. A big party woul be no fun at all at that point, so we've moved it closer to my birthday instead of Ken's. Unfortunately Ken saw the price quote on the cake. I left the paperwork out on my desk. I was just going to cover the cost myself and not let him have sticker shock. Seeing as Duff has gotten so big now with the show on Food Network and all his prices have gone way up since he did our wedding cake almost 5 years ago. It'll be fun besides you only turn 40 once.

that's all I can remember right now, I'm positive there was more but I'm a little sleep deprived and I have a toddler pulling on my leg.

catching up again

So I’m falling back into bad habits and not posting/updating. The thing is I have stuff to say but I go through and read about everyone else first and suddenly it’s hours later and I should get to bed because I know Alex will be up at 6am even though he’s gotten good about staying in his room and playing “quietly” until 7:00.

For about three years now my mom has been holding her Thanksgiving dinner a week/week and a half early. She got tired of being the second or third stop for my sister and step brothers. This way everyone comes and eats and visits, then sits and watches football with Bill. Well Alex of course starts coming down with something the Monday before we’re to leave. I thought it was a cold so I kept him home from school Tuesday hoping a day of rest would make him travel ready by Thursday. All day Tuesday his fever would spike and come down. So first thing Wednesday morning I got him a doctor’s appointment. The fact that he couldn’t talk at all was another sign. Luckily it was tonsillitis not strep. The Doctor told us he should be fine to travel once he had a couple doses of antibiotics in him but to base going on the trip by how he felt. He was looking
Much better by Thursday morning even if he still couldn’t talk above a whisper.

We missed our playgroup giving thanks party. I had food made and everything. It was also when the cookie exchange was being held. I ended up dropping everything off after we left the doctor’s office. I was able to go back once Ken got home from work get my share of the cookies and even some leftovers of the food. Actually half the playgroup was still there. I had a glass of wine too before heading home. It was much needed after spending the day with cranky sick boy.

So we went up to Erie. The drive wasn’t too bad a bit of snow as we got to the northern part of PA. We got there had dinner settled down the kids or tried to. Quin was having none of it. He’s gotten to the age where he knows he’s not at home and doesn’t like it.
By the end of the trip he was sleeping a relatively normal amount at night. But that first night was hell; the only way to get him settled was to bring him into bed with us which of course means I didn’t sleep. I hate being such a light sleeper; every little move noise wakes me.

Friday we hung out. Saturday morning I had my massage, and felt like happy jelly the rest of the day. Everyone started arriving around 1pm. Ken took them into the living room took portraits (at my mom and Bill’s Request) Dinner was around 3:30pm. It was weird everyone started leaving around 6pm. So we had a whole evening to just chill as well. My mom made me a chocolate raspberry martini for our second round of dessert at about 9pm. We got on the road by 10am Sunday and were back home by 5pm. I have never seen Quin so happy in my life.

Monday I had to work, Tuesday was catching up on laundry. Wednesday I had to cook the stuff we were taking to Su’s for Thanksgiving with Ken’s family. This was a much more relaxing day than usual because neither of Ken’s brothers was there. They cause Su so much stress with their clueless ness.

Friday Ken had a wedding and Saturday we attempted a family portrait. (Again we tried when Ken had everything set up at mom’s) Quin will not sit for a formal portrait. Ken has decided we aren’t attempting this again until he’s 5. The photographer, Judy, knew Ken from when they were both taking classes at HCC. After a few minutes she understood why we didn’t attempt this at home by ourselves. What I wouldn’t give to have someone like Krystal close by for things like this. I can get good pictures of the boys together, but then I’m letting them play and just firing away. If things start going downhill I play peek-a-boo from behind the camera. We were able to get a couple okay shots there is one where the three of us looked good so I just photoshoped a new head in for Quin from on shot a few frames earlier. I think I may still just try and get something cute of the boys to make the Christmas cards and include a copy of the family one when we send them out.

Oh yeah I almost forgot the Tuesday before we went to my mom’s we went in and ordered out cabinets. The kitchen project is on. I’m getting excited and just realizing it’s only like six weeks before we start work. Ken’s buddy Ted came by Sunday to look things over so he can give us a quote for the work we need done. He’ll be tearing out the old cabinets, knocking out the soffets, and taking the old tile backsplash down. Then he’ll install the new cabinets and prep the walls for the new back splash I have yet to design. I’m going to attempt to put that in myself but Ted did say he’d give me instructions. He said it was pretty easy and if I change my mind give him a call and he’ll give a quote to come out and do it too. In the midst of walking through the plans and such we discovered that knocking out the tiny wall that is currently next to the fridge will actually cause a whole lot of extra work. We would have to move three electrical outlets and tear out some of the hard wood floor and relay it. Major head ache because it was custom made for this house 15-20 years ago. We decided not to knock out that wall. Luckily after contacting Lowe’s they said as long as the angle cabinets haven’t been installed, we can exchange them with a possible 15% restocking fee. We might not even have to worry about that since they haven’t even been delivered yet. We’re leaving the fridge where it is, placing the 24” pantry next to it and having 36” base and wall cabinets installed between the pantry and where the door to the garage is. I think this gives us more storage space so I’m not real upset about the change. Ted said he’ll start the work the second week in January.

So because of where the return will be Ken suggested we rearrange the family room. It would have been very awkward to get in and out the way it was. I started thinking about it and got a bug up my ass and decided I wanted it done now before we got our tree and started decorating for Christmas. I moved a lot of stuff out on Friday while Ken was doing the wedding. We moved the furniture around Sunday morning. Its funny moving the TV to the wall we did makes it look so much bigger. The couch now faces the fireplace as well as the TV. Alex mostly likes it, well except now it’s even easier for Quin to get to his train table. He goes into a panic as soon as he’s with in a yard of it.

That’s it for now we’ll see how well I keep up the rest of the holiday season.

A month of Thankfulness

November is always a reminder to say thanks for many things. I'm trying to follow along with the blog promts over at DSP. Since I get here once a week if I'm lucky I've got a few days to catch up on.

11/1 What Family members are you thankful for and why?

First up would be my husband. For all his quirks and annoyances I love him. He balances me. I've had to learn patience and to step back on certain decisions instead of jumping in and just taking care of things. He can't make a quick decision at all, well most of the time. And if it's something that doesn't really impact the family I just make a few points or suggestions and step back. Ten years ago that would have been very hard. But it's made me better able to deal with the insanity that is a three year old.

Next are my boys. I love them to death and no matter how much they drive me crazy I would never change the fact that they are here. I feel like I have to be a better person for them. And it makes me try harder to be a better person, to count to ten and step away instead of getting frustrated and losing my temper.

Last would be my mom. She always encouraged me to be me. She was my strongest supporter and now she's me inspiration. The strength and courage it has taken these last few years to deal with breast cancer. She speaks her mind a lot more and she's learned to let go a lot of baggage from her life. Because somethings are just so much more important.

11/2 What Kitchen things re you thankful for?

My oven one of may favorite things to do is bake. Cookies are top on the list.

My hand mixer w/ a whisk blade. This thing makes it so much easier to make light and fluffy frostings and chocolate cheese pie. My husband is ever grateful for me introducing him to chocolate cheese pie.

the tea pot once the weather gets cooler our nightly ritual is to relax and have a hot cup of tea befor bed.

11/5 Give three or more reasons why you're thankful for Autumn

The crisp scent in the air

I love fall light for photographs it has such a warm tone.

and this goes back to when I was a kid, school starts again

11/6 What jobs do other people hold are you thankful for?

Emergency workers, their help in a crisis can be the difference between life and death

Garbage collectors, it's a dirty job but necessary for keeping our cities and towns healthy

Farmers with out them I wouldn't have food on my plate, they work a long day with out much thanks

11/7 Think of all the new things on the market since our parents were young and what they had to work with. What cleaning supplies are you thankful for?

swiffer
furniture wipes
stain and spot removers

heh caught up just in time for the weekend

Family

I got this from a friend of mine and figured it was a good reminder. I know I need one everyonce in a while.

F A M I L Y
I ran into a stranger as he passed by,
"Oh excuse me please" was my reply.

He said, "Please excuse me too;
I wasn't watching for you."

We were very polite, this stranger and I.
We went on our way and we said goodbye.

But at home a different story is told,
How we treat our loved ones, young and old.

Later that day, cooking the evening meal,
My son stood beside me very still.

When I turned, I nearly knocked him down.
"Move out of the way," I said with a frown.

He walked away, his little heart broken.
I didn't realize how harshly I'd spoken.
While I lay awake in bed,
God's still small voice came to me and said,

"While dealing with a stranger,
common courtesy you use,
but the family you love, you seem to abuse.

Go and look on the kitchen floor,
You'll find some flowers there by the door.

Those are the flowers he brought for you.
He picked them himself: pink, yellow and blue.

He stood very quietly not to spoil the surprise,
you never saw the tears that filled his little eyes."

By this time, I felt very small,
And now my tears began to fall.

I quietly went and knelt by his bed;
"Wake up, little one, wake up," I said.

"Are these the flowers you picked for me?"
He smiled, "I found 'em, out by the tree.

I picked 'em because they're pretty like you.
I knew you'd like 'em, especially the blue."

I said, "Son, I'm very sorry for the way I acted today;
I shouldn't have yelled at you that way."
He said, "Oh, Mom, that's okay.
I love you anyway."

I said, "Son, I love you too,
and I do like the flowers, especially the blue."

FAMILY
Are you aware that if we died tomorrow, the company
that we are working for could easily replace us in
a matter of days.
But the family we left behind will feel the loss
for the rest of their lives.
And come to think of it, we pour ourselves more
into work than into our own family,
an unwise investment indeed,
don't you think?
So what is behind the story?

Do you know what the word FAMILY means?
FAMILY = (F)ATHER (A)ND (M)OTHER (I) (L)OVE (Y)OU

So this week started with a bang literally. I get a call Monday morning at 7:00 AM. "Hi Honey, I totaled your car." Ken is fine and I'm really not mad, slightly annoyed and I may be mad once our insurance premium goes up, because he's had three speeding tickets this year as well. The whole reason he had my car is because it's had a huge dent in the driver side door for over a year now. My sister backed her minivan into it when I was up visiting the summer before last. So last spring when Ken found out about all the travel he'd be doing this year we decided it was best he take my car and park it in airport parking becuase another dent or scratch was not going to make a difference in how much we'd get as a trade in from it. Where as the Odyssey is only a year old and we want to keep it running a good long while.

He was heading into the toll booths at the Ft McHenry Tunnel and the guy in front of him stopped short. It was a Ford truck so while the entire front end of my car crumpled the truck only had a tiny scratch. Insurance covers a rental for ten days. And Ken has been car shopping, we're going with another GM car mostly because we have points on our GM car just sitting there and we figure we can get a really good deal on an '07 at this point. He's trying to decide between a Pontiac G6 and the Malibu Maxx. He likes the Maxx because of the hatchback which is good for him getting camera equipment in and out of the car and he like the G6 because it has a V-6 and really smooth ride. We can get the better deal on the Maxx right now, so he's leaning towards that but being a Libra that could change tomorrow. It will go back and forth like this until crunch time, the end of next week.

They say that around one a child's appetite decreases but damn Quin can still put away some food. The other night he had a couple pieces of Alex's chicken. A fifth of my pork chop, some green beans and an entire small sweet potato, it was about an inch and a half in diameter and between 4 and 5 inches long. Alex never ate a lot to begin with so it did worry me a bit when he was basically down to one meal a day between the ages of 12 months and 30 months. He's better now but Quin still out eats him. He's definately going to be the big little brother.

Quin is also at that hard age where he's goiong down to one nap. So I've been trying to push his morning nap back but I can only do that so much. Three days a week I have to pick Alex up at preschool at 1pm. So putting him down later than 11am isn't an option at the moment. And he's just too cranky for words to let him go until after we get back from getting Alex. I'm seriously going to think about letting Alex stay all day at school those three days come spring.

We've had two and a half days of rain. I'm sure we've made a small dent in the drought conditions at this point. Looks like we can expect more tomorrow. So I need to figure out what to do with two kids for the day if I don't want to be trapped in the house with them by myself all day. At least today was Ken's normal friday off, so we could trade through out the day. Hmmm maybe that's why I woke with a migraine this morning. I know if you're trying to get pregnant you're not supposed to use advil but extra strength tylenol does nothing for my migraine but I figure it's early enough in this cycle it won't matter. It's better than being in pain all day.

okay that all that's new for right now.

photos and photos

I'm starting off today with a couple of my favorite recent pictures of the boys
this first one just shows the difference in they're personalities so well

the second one I like because of Quin's smile

Quin has the most soulful puppy dog eyes, I know it's kind of sad I'm comparing my son to a dog but that's what they remind me of sometimes.

So I had my day off from the kids yesterday, Ken told me the night before he was dreading this day alone with the boys. But damn, it I've earned this at least twice a month since March he's been gone for a good portion of the week. That means no break for me, I'm on 24-7. When he's home at least, I can leave the house for a few hours childless. So we figured out something he could do with the kids on a rainy day. They went to the B&O museum.
When I got home last night the boys had just been settled into bed, so I snuck in and gave kisses. Ken said Alex had the time of his life. You could see the happy energy radiating from him. We're planning another trip there because ken didn't realize there were more exhibits in the other buildings not just in the main one. He said Alex had to name all the trains after Thomas and Friends characters. :roflol:
And Quin pulled one of my childhood tricks last night while Ken was making dinner. He got a hold of the box of wipes we keep next to my desk for diaper changes. Not only did he get it open he started pulling out the wipes. Ken said he had emptied a practically new package half way. The wipes were everywhere filled the whole center section of the family room. Quin was sitting in the biggest pile of them, so of course his pants were wet. I could have been worse he could have done what I actually did as a toddler. I got a hold of a box of tissues and started shredding them, the mess was all over the living room.
Yesterday was lovely and a little weird. I left around 7:30 am got to NY about three hours later. Though it took me another half hour to get to the Javitz center and then find parking. The Photo Expo is always overwhelming and I haven't been to one in about 4 years. My priority this year was to get info from the different album companies primarily for print and bind services on the coffee table style albums. I stayed away from the camera/lens vendors because that'll just make me want something we can't afford right now. Though nikon has a new super wide lens 18mm/3.5-55mm5.6 for about $120. it gets decent reviews especially as been light and versitile enough for when you need to be on the move.

I started winding down around 1 and went to get my car. It started pouring rain as I came out of the lincoln tunnel. So i got to Dianne's around 1:30. Ari is adorable, I just love his smile. He was showing off climbing on one of his toys so he could reach the lights. I even got a kiss as he left with his grandmother for the afternoon. Nilsa fell asleep soon after I started holding her. She's a noisy sleeper reminded me a bit of Alex. Always moving in her sleep too. Of course the fact that I was stroking her little foot periodically didn't help I'm sure. I really need to read the manual for my flash, I want to be able to control the light out put more. Even boucing the light was blowing out some of the pictures I took. I didn't do too badly on the hand held available light shots, though the ones that went down to a really slow shutter speed have camera movement in them.

I left around 4:30 and stopped to get something to eat outside of Trenton. I think that's what helped me miss the worst of the traffic. Though there was a back up around the Christiana Mall exit in DE.
I think I'm coming down with something. Around noon I was feeling a bit feverish and now it hurts to swallow, things must be a bit swollen because my ear hurts too. Wonderful, trying to decide which will help more the echinacea or the chamomile tea will help more.

oh Alex has found a way to help me fold clothes. He climbs into the dryer and fetches the clothes at the back them hands them to me to fold.:roflol:

So I found these photos last spring when I was visiting my dad. My grandmother is the girl at the very front of the group photo. I think from that you can figure out who she is in the others. Anyway I see these and I keep wondering what happened to that girl that she became the cold, controlling woman I knew. One who cut herself off from all her family except her most immediate family and did what ever she could to keep her parents, husband, and sons from spending time with them as well.

Growing up I saw italian families on tv and until I was a teen I thought that was exaggeration. Everyone getting together on weekends, aunts and uncles chatting, kids running around lots of food and talking, always talking. becuase my italian family was nothing like that. The only family I ever saw were my great grandparents, the sweetest most loving people I've known, my grandparents and my uncles. Except for occasionally my grandfather would sneak us out while my grandmother was at work and take us over to his brother's house. When ever we were there it was like the families I saw on tv.

Something happened in the early fifties. Not sure what, my dad only remembers them moving from Genesee street. He doesn't have a whole lot of emotional depth, my dad, so it didn't really bother him that he was moving away from his cousins and friends, in some cases both. My uncle Tony might know he's only a year or two younger than my dad but things are kind of strained between the brothers, so I'm not real sure he'd talk to me about it if I asked. Something happend that she basically stopped wanting to be Italian. It's kind of surprising since they were in Utica, NY. If anything being Italian even a woman, would have been a benefit in getting promotions at work.

So the puzzle just sits there in my head. I have no names of people to contact to find more of my family's past, most of those who were living when it happened are dead. There were also pictures of her as a very young child in portraits with my great grandparents you can see the how much she was loved even in those stiff photos. It just makes me wonder even more how she became what she was. Like I never knew how much she loved baseball until she was in an assited living apartment because the alzhiemers was starting to get bad. She still recognized us at that point but she always drifted back. She kept talking about what a wonderful time she had visiting Cooperstown and the baseball hall of fame. We never saw that side of her as kids. Just the woman who was sweeping up the crumbs under the table even as we ate. Or she would clean up the toys we'd been playing with before dinner even though my mom had told us we could leave them and go back and play after dinner was over. The woman who had screaming matches with her parents in their apartment upstairs, I assume because they went and visited relatives and friends on the other side of town. Because right after my great grandfather would leave the house and either work in his garden or go for a walk.

Even after his funeral, she didn't join her mother, aunts and cousins at the wake being held at her uncle's house. No she took her family home then took her sons stawberry picking, only her sons, not their wives, not her grandchildren. My mom always felt that family was important, she'd missed her own sister's wedding to be at the funeral. Even after my parents divorced, she brought us up to visit our grandparents, because my father couldn't be bothered. I know that day was very confusing for her becuase no matter how much she fought and argued with her brothers and sisters, they'd always work things out, eventually. Ah well, maybe I should look more carefully at the boxes of stuff my father has of hers, maybe I can find out more that way.

Onto other things, can I say how nice it is to be in a real bra again. Nursing bras aren't the best for support. I've been really lucky both of my kids self weaned. Alex at 9 1/2 months and Quin just as I was considering weaning him. About a week before his birthday he stopped nursing on the right side, then the last time he nursed from the left was the day of his birthday party. It's kind of nice to have my body to myself again. Who knows how long it'll last since we've been trying since late June. I'm wondering if even though my cycle came back, that BFing was still working as birth control. So we're going to keep trying until my birthday that is. I just don't want to deal with pregnancy after 40. I mean it's different if I get pregnant before than and deliever after 40, ahh I don't know guess it's just a silly rule I have in my head. If it happens it happens, if it doesn't I have two sweet boys.

So our kitchen plans have gone through some revisions. Mostly because Ken wanted a 36" range. Then we talked and threw ideas around and decided on a 36"

Jenn-Air cooktop and a 30" oven.

The cook top will be about where our range is now but the oven will move over to the return we're putting in. We got our Quote for the Kraftmaid cabinets we wanted. It was about 1500 more than I guessed, so not far off.

I can't remember if we pick this style

Or this

The quartz countertops Lowe's offers were going to be about 3 grand. I remember when Ken's sister renoated her kitchen she actually went to a place in PA and picked her slab directly because it got her a better price. I'm going to ask where she got her's but I've been researching. Most of the local warehouses do have a whole lot of choice, then I came across this site and it looks like they do work all along the mid atlantic. Marble.com The choices and colors they have is amazing, we'll know for sure in January if it'll be a better price. Mostly because we're going to wait until the cabinets are being installed before going for an estimate. They usually install within a week. Guess we'll be making a trip to South Plainfield NJ. They have three locations but that is actually the closest one to us.

He's one

Its hard to believe he's one now. He seems so much younger at one than Alex did. I guess it's because I've been through it once, and maybe I baby him more. But we took like a 190 shots on saturday for the family party. I don't think there will be nearly as many for the playgroup party tomorrow. So I'll share some.







As long as he was with Aunt Su, Alex allowed Quin to play with some of his toys.



Enjoying a cracker with YeaYea





then his Aunt got him started on a cheese curl habit





at least he eats Zucchini like it's candy

He's already got girls fawning over him